First dates are exciting but come with a lot of questions. What should I wear? Where should we go? And one that may have escaped your mind until right this second—should I let someone pick me up on the first date?
Obviously that might sound pretty convenient, but is it safe? Is it smart? In this blog, we’re going to look at the pros and cons of letting someone pick you up on the first date. After that, we’ll share our answer to the question that we think is best.
Pros of Getting Picked Up On the First Date
Let’s start our discussion by looking at the benefits that come from letting someone pick you up on the first date. Again, this isn’t necessarily what we’re recommending, but we want to give you all the information in case you want to make your own decision.
It’s Convenient
I don’t have to drive? I don’t have to clean my car? I don’t have to figure out directions or worry about being on time? Count me in! When you let someone else pick you up on the first date, you put a lot of the responsibility for the work in their court. It’s impossibly to deny just how convenient that can be.
Gas is Expensive
With gas prices being, well, silly…not being the one to have to drive on a first date could save you some cash. Sure, it might be nice to toss him or her a few bucks to help (especially if you’re splitting the checks), but if we’re being real—no one is expecting you to do that. If budget is a big issue, letting them pick you up could be nice perk.
It Makes Logistical Coordination Easier
Ever tried to link up with someone new somewhere you maybe haven’t been to before? Sure you have! And if you recall, it was probably somewhat challenging, especially if you’ve never met in person before. The nervousness of sitting there trying to spot and pick them out is less than fun. When they pick you up at your house, though, you know it’s them and you don’t have to worry about coordination at all.
It’s Great If You Want to Have a Few Drinks
When you don’t have to drive, you don’t have to worry about having a plan to safely get home after having a few drinks. Now, of course, this brings up a few other questions. Should you even be drinking on a first date (our article answers that), and is your date drinking? Because if they’re drinking, it really makes this point a bit moot.
Cons of Getting Picked Up On the First Date
Now that we’ve looked at the brighter side of getting picked up on the first date, let’s take a look at some of the potential drawbacks that you need to be aware of. Our goal in this section is not to scare you, but just to give you a realistic look at the choice you’re trying to make.
You Might Not Know Them Yet
If our parents taught us anything, it’s not to talk to strangers. Granted, that’s unfortunately what we have to do to get to know someone new! But that doesn’t mean we have to get into their car with them right away and give them complete control. If your date is with someone you’ve known for a long time, this isn’t an issue. But when they’re new or you met them through an online dating app, it’s worth weighing into the decision.
They Might Not Be a Safe Driver
We’ll spare you the car accident statistics, but will say this—driving is dangerous, and it gets a lot more dangerous when someone isn’t good at it. Even if you’ve known someone for a long time, if you haven’t driven with them before, you don’t know if they’re safe or Speedy Gonzalez. Additionally, you don’t know if they properly maintain their car or not to keep things safe.
If the risk of this is not clicking yet, then click the link on car accident statistics we provided.
You Lose an Exit Strategy
When you let someone pick you up on the first date, they’re in control. While there’s usually nothing wrong with this, what happens if you have a horrible time and want to leave early? What happens if they say something terribly offensive that makes you want to throw up?
When you drive yourself to a first date, you can leave whenever you want. But if they’re the one in control, you’re at their mercy for getting home. And not to mention, that probably makes for an awkward car ride.
One quick caveat before we move on—if you do decide to let them pick you up for the first date, you can always call an Uber or a friend if you truly feel unsafe. Never feel obligated to get back into the car with anyone you don’t feel safe with. Period. Hard Stop. End of discussion.
Our Answer On If You Should Let Someone Pick You Up on Date One
So, with all of that said, what’s the final verdict? Here’s our answer:
- If you’ve known the person for a long time (and feel safe with them) and you’re just now exploring a romantic relationship, there’s probably nothing wrong with letting them pick you up on the first date.
- If it’s a first date with someone who you just met or you met online or you don’t know very well, if at all possible, drive yourself to the date. Take an Uber or public transportation. Sure, it may not be as convenient, but is a little convenience really worth sacrificing your safety?